I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
my being single is dangerous.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
