he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
