After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Randomize
