i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize