we're blogging at a bar
Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
