I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Randomize