when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
