Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
