How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
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