hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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