She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Farmville is her only friend.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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