i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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