I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
