I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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