So gin and wine won't be happening again
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
