I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Randomize
