did you get engaged???
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
