escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
