where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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