when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
