New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
