you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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