To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Randomize
