Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
