fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize