WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
