I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
