So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize