Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry ScorpioChef hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(415): View more from California

I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?

(512): View more from Texas

Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.

(415): View more from California

Watch for tornadoes.

Fav 33 2926 1087
share tweet
(617): View more from Massachusetts

you mean i was at the winter classic?

Fav 39 5569 983
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(913): View more from Kansas

Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now

Fav 35 7770 1255
share tweet
(813): View more from Florida

thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not

Fav 10 1579 2662
share tweet
(770): View more from Georgia

he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.

(352): View more from Florida

teach me your ways.

Fav 6 3323 1147
share tweet
(386): View more from Florida

At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?

Fav 12 2429 920
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(417): View more from Missouri

Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.

Fav 0 738 503
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(519): View more from Ontario

No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.

Fav 1 755 271
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(260): View more from Indiana

HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER

(425): View more from Washington

At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.

Fav 0 58 36
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT