Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
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