He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Randomize
