Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(503): View more from Oregon

Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.

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(907): View more from Alaska

If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.

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(305): View more from Florida

Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.

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(206): View more from Washington

Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.

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(604): View more from British Columbia

The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.

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(702): View more from Nevada

I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?

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(647): View more from Ontario

Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?

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(239): View more from Florida

I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.

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