Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
