I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
