Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I just saw a hot homeless man
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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