I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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