Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
