We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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