Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Randomize
