nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
