let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
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