I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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