i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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