mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
