you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Randomize
