Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
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