Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
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