Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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