69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize