WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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